I'm not arguing they are "ridiculous" asks. But many of them are certainly expensive asks. I mean, just take one simple one for starters, "Works with the database and version we use". Depending on the size and complexity of the software that can easily be a multi-million dollar project.
Absolute cost is much less important than cost-benefit. If a feature will cost millions and result in no increase in sales or profit then you say no to it. If the feature costs millions and will result in hundreds of millions in extra sales then it should be a very high priority.
You can never just look at a feature and state that it's objectively too expensive without looking at the impact of the feature as well.
I agree with you, and that is pretty much my whole point: all features have a cost, so you need to look at what the real benefits of these are, instead of throwing out a giant list of wants and saying "end users care about these things but programmers don't."
Only point I disagree with is when you say "If the feature costs millions and will result in hundreds of millions in extra sales..." It's never that assured that a feature will bring any extra revenue. I actually spent a ton of time in the 00s porting an enterprise software app to the preferred DB of a huge potential client. It was a months long project, and the client ended up not buying the product in any case, and their DB choice was rare enough that it wasn't a big win in the broader market.
