I'm looking at folks that are having kids when they are older than i was and they seem to have their shit together so much more. In looking back I feel like I squandered some of the time I had with my children by not really understanding how fast the years go by and focusing too much on being a provider vs. being present. My youngest is ready to leave the home and I still have these flickering day dreams of these things I'm going to do with my kids and I still see them as kids.