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> - You can be professional and proud of your job, but your job is not your identity. There is more to you than what you do for a living.

I see this frequently pointed out, as in not introducing yourself by your profession, etc.

But what are you then?

You introduce yourself as an uncle to somebody or a dad?

Yes there are things outside of working, but its a core part of who a person is.



> But what are you then?

"What are you" is a fun question to ask, particularly when traveling. Most Americans answer with their race or job. Italians, in my experience, gave answers with their local heritage; in India I frequently got a religion.


Race?? Wow.

Around here you're more likely to hear what their preferred outdoor activity is.


Hi I'm ${first_name}.

I only ever ask what someone does if it's clearly relevant to the context in which I met them, such as their lunch break.


It's part of what you do, and it does influence how you see things, but your life does not being or end with a job.

Your job friends, however friendly, might not necessarily remain your friends after you leave the company.

You can care about your job and your craft, and doing good for your customers to do your part in building a better world for everyone... but there must be something else outside that or your life will be pretty empty, and might even affect your job in the long run.


Leading workshops in USA and Europe has been pretty eyeopening.

Americans: “I’m so and so from $employer where I do software engineering in the foobles department”

Europeans: “I’m so and so from $city where I live with 3 kids and enjoy basket weaving. For work I build foobles”

You have to explicitly ask Europeans about their employers whereas Americans seem to get completely consumed by their company so much they lose all other identity.


I noticed this at 2600 meetings: "I'm so-and-so, I hack on $technology and I like to teach $interest", and some would mention their employer as an aside, but some wouldn't.

Whereas at tech-bro meetups: "I'm so-and-so, I work for $employer in the $technology group".


Gotta love the snide overgeneralization implying Americans are techbros.


It's a puzzling observation, isn't it? By now, every at-will US employee will have internalized that they are disposable, and yet they continue to identify as a member of $COMPANY family. It's just bizarre, and I just can't think of an explanation.


Combination of an inherited Anglo class system and American corporatism.


Prestige?


If the workshops are professional workshops, the American response seems more natural and appropriate.

Honestly, I would be weirded out if people start rambling about their kids and hobbies at a tech conference.


They were professional workshops. Your employer and your kids are equally irrelevant to the conversation.


I disagree. Not equally irrelevant. Your employer is connected to your profession, your hobbies/kids are not.

I attend a ton of AI/ML conferences (which count as professional conferences) all over the world. On almost all badges and tags, under your name you have your affiliation (company or university). You don't have number of kids or your random hobby on your badge for a reason.

See here for a list of badges (not my site):

https://data-mining.philippe-fournier-viger.com/conference-b...


Part of me understands that people have lives and don’t identify with work. But if that’s you, what are you doing with your life exactly? You only have so many years to live. Most of your waking hours are spent working.

If why you’re doing for work isn’t also your passion, it might be time to reconsider what you are doing.


> if you are putting on one face for your personal life and another for work, something is wrong.

Yet that's what most people do.


After 2008 something that always sticks in my mind was nobody puts where they worked on their gravestone.


Most of my friends know I do DevOps/SRE which is relevant to a lot of conversations we may have. They don't usually know or care who I do it for.


That's what I meant, I will edit the comment to make it clearer.


You can start by stating what you are good at.


“Hi I’m John, I’m good at basket weaving”


Why not?


Maybe at a basketball court but in a public setting? No body's going to take you seriously.


I don't need them to. I take my satisfaction from my baskets.




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