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My son put effort into dressing up for his Year 10 formal as that is what you do. But during the event he observed that most kids focused on how they looked rather than noticing others, and thought he should have spent a lot less effort into his outfit :)


> But during the event he observed that most kids focused on how they looked rather than noticing others

Genuinely, that is good. People who care and judge how others look beyond normal social propriety tend to be pretty bad to be around.


Or that's bad, because all those kids who spent time looking good, didn't get as many compliments for their effort than they expected, or perhaps even deserved.

There are many caveats with judging people by their appearances, but complimenting someone on the part of their look they put unusual effort in for some unusual occasion, seems pretty healthy to me.

(Well, there's also the caveat that the rich ones will have better access to exquisite clothes to begin with…)


I think the point is more around the collective distraction of dressing to a formal (and for kids, unfamiliar) standard, rather than enjoying time with the people around you at a party.


I think kids are constantly comparing.

Watch how many of them are buying exactly what their friends buy, so they can fit in and relax a bit.


Not just kids




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