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It was a formative experience, that's for sure. I learned that there is a time and place to "play hardball". I learned that you don't have to be an asshole about it either, and that while it definitely harms your reputation it can also build respect and doesn't have to destroy your relationship with the person.

More importantly, it taught me to trust my kids, show them my perspective, and put my own interests on the line for them.

My dad was a teacher at that school; the people I threatened were his bosses. I talked to him before I did it - in fact, I had only made an offhand comment about being able to bomb that test in revenge. He's the one that pointed out that was leverage, and suggest that I consider explicitly using it.

I was terrified that he could have lost his job for that stunt. Much later, he told me that they never even brought it up to him. He retired from that school after outlasting both the principal and superintendent, so obviously it didn't hurt him that much.

As a result I make it a point to trust my kids when the stakes are bigger than they're comfortable with, and to highlight the potential effects when I think they may not be obvious to them.



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