You know what is weird. This is oddly personal but, idk, bear with me.
I was a software dev that went to seminary in my youth (started coding professionally at 15, went to seminary at 18) I intellectually "deconstructed" about 9 years ago around 30 but it significantly reduced my brain power for years, every time I slept my brain kept revisiting existential questions, it wasn't until I felt I had come to emotional peace with that deconstruction and had also identified a new rational/personally satisfying grounding for meaning that all that background processing freed up.
You see I've observed, within my co-hort that I've met and spoken with, that I'm on the far end of the spectrum for solving problems overnight. My productivity has always been high but with single day lag for difficult problems.
I may have had a bit of religious fixation/borderline OCD on the subject, my parents certainly had to work quite a bit when I was younger to use positive re-inforcement to short circuit some compulsive repetitive behaviors I had, idk, I was never officially diagnosed.
You know what is weird. This is oddly personal but, idk, bear with me.
I was a software dev that went to seminary in my youth (started coding professionally at 15, went to seminary at 18) I intellectually "deconstructed" about 9 years ago around 30 but it significantly reduced my brain power for years, every time I slept my brain kept revisiting existential questions, it wasn't until I felt I had come to emotional peace with that deconstruction and had also identified a new rational/personally satisfying grounding for meaning that all that background processing freed up.
You see I've observed, within my co-hort that I've met and spoken with, that I'm on the far end of the spectrum for solving problems overnight. My productivity has always been high but with single day lag for difficult problems.
I may have had a bit of religious fixation/borderline OCD on the subject, my parents certainly had to work quite a bit when I was younger to use positive re-inforcement to short circuit some compulsive repetitive behaviors I had, idk, I was never officially diagnosed.